Holocaust Education at UHaifa: A Designer’s Perspective

If you’ve been following my blog, I taught as a Professor of Art and Design for a decade prior to taking my sabbatical and coming to Israel to pick up the MA in Holocaust Ed at the University of Haifa. I’ve had nightmares about the Shoah since the age of 13. My faculty art exhibitions showcase what I see in my nightmares. This post reflects and highlights pieces from my Design portfolio that I’ve created in the past 2 years while studying at the University of Haifa.

The first piece I designed while attending the program was for the Atlit Detention Center, located a few miles outside of Haifa. My Practical Curating Course met at the center during the Fall Semester of 2015. I was assigned the testimony of a man by the name of Aharon Shorer. I didn’t have any photographs of him, and none were found on record at the Detention Center. I selected specific photos from the photography shoots that I did of the camp throughout the semester, combined with the Rockwell Font. The barbed wire on the poster was also created from typographic elements.

Hanukkah was shortly approaching as I finished the poster for the Atlit Detention Center. Each year I design a new creation for the Festival of Lights. I chose the Shema prayer for personal reasons. My Rabbi introduced me to reading the Shema prayer about 4 years ago. It helped combat my Holocaust Nightmares. The poster is quite large–approximately 30 x 40 inches. The images above show a close-up view of the poster, and an overall view of it in its entirety.

In the summer of 2016, I opted to move out of the Uhaifa dorms and to Tsfat–where my Rabbi resides with his family. A few weeks into my arrival in Tsfat, I started to have Holocaust Nightmares again. This time–my Rabbi appeared in them also. Our conversations begin as we are awaiting deportation for the concentration camp. I embarked on a new design series which I called “UNFINISHED.” This was the first poster I designed in the series.

My 2016 Fall Semester at Uhaifa began in a design frenzy. I had multiple projects going at once. First, was the creation of the Routing System Posters for the Ghez Collection of Jewish Artists for the Hecht Museum. While this exhibition never made it to the public’s eye due to a limited budget, I was kept very busy until the end of the semester creating the routing system posters for my Curating Class. I really enjoyed researching that era in history, along with the popular fonts being used in way-finding design.

The second project I tackled was a complete marketing package for my Rabbi’s Therapy practice. I began by creating his business card…Not an easy task. Designing for a therapist has been one of my largest design challenges. How does one create mood and emotions? I made three attempts at his business card. Finally, I decided to smear some paint around on a paper plate and take a picture. The rest is history. Everything else fell into place.

The next area of his marketing campaign required me to design a set of Soul Repair Therapy Cards. They are used on his Facebook Therapy page as quotes for the day. I decided to break down the set into different colors/ moods. YELLOW is JOY. BLUE is DEPRESSION. RED is ANGER. GREEN is PHYSICAL HEALTH, and the RAINBOW colored card represents multiple moods/ categories.

My Holocaust nightmares continued that fall, and I kept designing new posters and adding to my UNFINISHED series. As one nightmare ended, a new one would begin and take off where the previous one had dissolved. This was a new phase in my nightmares–almost like a soap opera of continuation:

Winter came and settled across Israel. Heavy rains, fog, and snow were welcomed in Tsfat. By now I was familiar with the Old City, and my many favorite walking paths held new inspiration of wonder. With camera in hand, I captured the beautiful creations of nature and the songs that could be heard through a winter’s night. I created 2 postcards during my holiday break:

“Whispers of White Light across Tsfat, Israel” was photographed in a heavy rain storm with fog rumbling in through the hills. The second postcard showcases my fascination with all of the mannequins found on Jerusalem street in the Old City:

I decided it was time to do a major over-haul to my Graphic Design and Photography website online. I trashed my old site, and began building a new one from scratch. I had so many photos of the sites I had toured across Israel, combined with my work as a Designer–that it was simply time for a new one.

https://enigma3304.wixsite.com/pamelafiedler

During this time, I was also in construction on the new Therapy website for my Rabbi. His business card was done, the Soul Repair Therapy cards were a success, and the website was nearing completion. He was expanding his practice, and also writing a new therapy book. My job was to layout the entire body of text, combined with photos–and also design the book cover.

https://www.zalmannelson.com/

By the time I finished completion on “Secrets of the Tanya”— his website had been published. I was required to add an additional Tanya page to his website, along with creating a new Facebook Advertising banner.

https://www.facebook.com/DoTanyaTherapy/

I had put aside my “UNFINISHED” series for a few months, and decided to return to it. I had so much I wanted to say. However, sometimes the words and creativity don’t always come together all at once. My third poster kept challenging me. I was never satisfied with it. I kept re-working it and creating hybrid after hybrid:

http://enigma3304.wixsite.com/ash-from-the-rose

I kept adding my work to my above website: “Holocaust Nightmares: ASH FROM THE ROSE.” It showcases my faculty exhibition artwork surrounding the Shoah, along with my photographs and book memoir.

Lag B’Omer in Tsfat fills the streets with crowds of people, parades, and night time activities. Just a few miles down the road is the small town of Meron–where close to 800,000 Jews came this spring to celebrate Lag B’Omer. Many of which, stayed in Tsfat. I wanted to capture the mass of the crowd, and not focus on specific faces.

My summer has been spent working on the marketing campaign for the Tsfat Community Players. I researched the Comedy/ Tragedy masks for a couple of months. Along with, looking at many different branding campaigns that other theaters had. I decided that I didn’t want the Tsfat Theater to be represented by the classic drama masks and set out on my own design mission. I watched the movie “Shakespeare in Love” again–to get inspiration in creating the new logo for the theater. From start to finish, this design took me approximately 15 hours. Once it was complete in black ink and vector mode, it was time to look at the addition of color:

https://www.facebook.com/Tsfat-Community-Players-1365019863576271/

Color changes everything, doesn’t it? Now that I have the logo mastered, I had to create an advertising poster for the theater–a Call For Actors and Actresses in their next production:

This also gave the director the opportunity to see the logo in motion, and working as the advertising and branding centerpiece. The Facebook website page was created, and I kept moving forward. The next item on the agenda was to design an advertising poster for the 2017-18 Season:

With three weeks left to go in my semester, what’s next on my design palette? I’m currently in production on creating a TSFAT: Holy City of Air travel and tourism website. I’ll be on vacation in Rome and Spain after my semester ends. I plan on creating a new business card for myself. As a designer for Holocaust Education, I don’t think I’ve always taken the easiest roads. However, sometimes the ones less traveled help pioneers who boldly go where so few are brave enough to journey…

Holocaust Nightmares: Shema in the Holy Land

“HolyCast” from my Postcards from Paradise series

The most popular question that is asked during my lectures and art exhibitions about my Holocaust Nightmares: “Why do you have them?”…renders the most complicated answer(s). I wasn’t alive during World War II. I was born 26 years after it ended. In this post, I am going to discuss that which has plagued me for over 30 years: WHY.

WHY Holocaust Nightmares? My answer comes in the form of 3 parts. Without each part, I do not believe I would have had any nightmares about the Shoah. And, some parts have more weight or value than others.

• Part 1: I have nightmares about the Holocaust because for whatever reason–G-d chose me to be a witness to this era in history. The nightmares began at age 13, during the month of April (the same month as Hitler’s birthday). In the majority of them I am 13-14 years old. And, while I have asked G-d many questions about humanity from what I have witnessed…there is 1 question that remains number 1: Children of all colors and race play together on the playground. At what age do we as a society–teach them that this is not proper? At what age do we stop playing together, and are brainwashed into believing it is proper to put on a military uniform and try to kill one another? Children do not think this way: Adults do.

“Hitler was an Architect First”

• Part 2: I have nightmares about the Holocaust because I am a “sensitive.” If I were not, I do not believe that I would have them at all. And, for me–this is the largest part of the equation. Why did G-d choose to make me a “sensitive?” To describe humans who are more in-tune to paranormal events a term was created – “highly sensitive person” or HSP. According to some experts, those that are HSP have a biological difference that allows their nervous system to process sensory data much more deeply and thoroughly than the average person.  Yes, it can also be hereditary.  It is estimated that approximately 15-20% of humans have nervous systems that can be described as HSP. Don’t confuse “sensitives” with psychics.  There is a definite difference. I do not have the ability to “move energy on.” Psychics can–and do.  Not all energy that I sense is positive or negative…Nor is all of it from my Holocaust nightmares. Some of it is simply in transition, or leaving one place and getting ready to enter another. While other types of energy are of historical significance.

If you have ever watched the film “The Sixth Sense”–you will have a better understanding of this kind of energy & its movements. I see dead people in churches all of the time. However, some of them are not dead yet–they are just in transition. But, they appear to me as ghosts. One such example was a woman by the name of RoseMary. She sat at the glass table directly in front of the bathrooms at a church I was formerly employed at. Her clothing indicated that she was from this era in time. She was not happy or sad. She simply stared directly out the window and kept communicating to me over and over that her name was RoseMary. I finally worked up the courage to ask one of the employees (who had worked there for almost 15 years)–if she was aware of a woman by the name of RoseMary –who had been a member of the congregation but had passed? She said no. RoseMary was not dead yet. She was indeed a member of the church, and she was dying of kidney failure. So, in a certain sixth sense–what I was witnessing was RoseMary in transition from life into death.

I don’t go looking for energy. I don’t believe in disturbing it. What do I mean by this? I don’t go searching for haunted houses or places on purpose to engage in conversations with the energy that presides there. If it wants to find you–it will. In certain situations, I do not believe that the energy is positive or negative: It is of historical context. Our family farmstead resides on the Otoe Indian trade route from the 1700’s. We have yet to figure out in one of our bedrooms if the medicine man had his teepee in this location, or if Indians are simply buried below the ground–and in this location. Their energy resides inside this room. People who stay there overnight have been awakened to Indians chanting (myself included). Shadows of Indians protrude on the walls. Also, when I have Holocaust nightmares in this room, the ceiling fan (which has been broken mechanically for years) will be spinning rapidly when I wake. The moment that I place one foot outside of the room? The fan stops. The energy in this room is of historical context. It is not positive or negative. It simply resides there.

There is a difference between divine energy and paranormal energy. I view paranormal energy as energy that can and will be negative, demonic or part of the devil. This does not mean that all of it is, but it has the potential to be in that category. It could have been human at one time. I view divine energy as the complete opposite–perhaps it was human, perhaps it never was. But it is positive energy that is a part of G-d.

Have you ever had a divine or paranormal experience that meant much more to you after the encounter versus when you were involved in it? One afternoon when I was in undergrad school–my girl friends decided to get out the OUIJA board and play it. They were bored. I was caught up reading for a class, so I hung out on the bed while they navigated the board on the dorm room floor. After much egging on, they convinced me to come over and give it a try. I was ready to take a break from reading; so why not? As we placed our fingers on the planchette it started to move & create words out of letters:

“I do not want to play with Pamela. I cannot teach her anything.”

Whatever. My friends thought the OUIJA board was copping an attitude. I got up and walked away, telling them that I didn’t believe in cardboard demons to begin with. The episode did not mean much to me at the time. But, as the years have passed it continues to plague my mind. I have matured, and come to realize that perhaps it really WAS a demon. And, if it was–it was making a statement directly to me…about me….knowing something more about myself at the time that I had yet to recognize.

“JEWSus Wept” from my Postcards from Paradise series

Part 3. I have nightmares about the Holocaust because it happened: The Third Reich kept very accurate records. At the time my nightmares began, I was reading about the Civil War in history, and getting the Civil War magazine–I wasn’t hanging out with World War II, or watching Holocaust movies. Sometimes when I am creating my artwork about my Holocaust Nightmares–I am not aware of the historical accuracy at the time…Until I stumble upon it at a later date & read about it or someone tells me. In many of my nightmares about the SHOAH, I am in France. Sometimes, I am witnessing the Third Reich and Hitler marching down the street and coming through an arch. The swastika flags are blowing through the Paris skyline. Each time I witness this parade, I am with my friend, David. He is much older than me. During grad school (Graphic Design) at the University of Iowa–we were asked to create a series. I chose to create a political poster series about my Holocaust Nightmares.

My 3rd or 4th poster design in this series focuses on this Third Reich parade that I have just described. I selected an old vintage bike photograph from Paris, and began to super-impose Hitler’s face through the Arch. One of my colleagues from class decided to stop by and see how  my creative process was coming along. When he witnessed my poster “Only the Jews” he asked me if I knew what I was doing & if I knew what I was creating. I explained to him what this nightmare was about, and why I was super-imposing Hitler’s face through the arch. He laughed, and said I was “doing it without even realizing I was doing it.” He went on to explain that the Arch was the Arc de Triomphe, and Hitler and his troops did indeed march through it when they invaded Paris…

“Only the Jews” from my political poster series

No therapist, holy person, or medical personnel has been able to get my Holocaust nightmares to stop…except one. I have been in therapy with my Rabbi now for almost a year and a half. Ever since he introduced me to the Shema prayer–the Holocaust nightmares have ceased. Shema Yisrael (or Sh’ma Yisrael; Hebrew שְׁמַע יִשְׂרָאֵל‎; “Hear, [O] Israel”) are the first two words of a section of the Torah, and is the title (sometimes shortened to simply Shema) of a prayer that serves as a centerpiece of the morning and evening Jewish prayer services. To help further my healing, I hope to one day stand in the HolyLand, and recite these inspirational words…

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Pam L. Fiedler is an Adjunct Professor of Design + Universal Communication at Southeast Community College in Nebraska. She teaches at both the Lincoln & Beatrice campus. She graduated in 2006 with her Master of Fine Arts in Graphic Design from the University of Iowa. “Holocaust Nightmares: Ash From the Rose” is her first novel, and is available for purchase through Amazon Kindle. Purchase ASH FROM THE ROSE

Holocaust Nightmares: The Power of Prayer

Holocaust Nightmares 2009 Exhibition Poster Museum of Religious Arts, Logan Iowa

 

In the fall of 2012, someone had commented on one of my blogs about my Holocaust Nightmares. This was prior to writing my memoir & creating a writer’s blog on WordPress. In their discussion they had asked if I had contacted the Rabbis at Chabad via the ASK THE RABBI Link & asked if they could help me. I was not familiar with the ASK THE RABBI link and was willing to try this route.

A couple of weeks later, a Rabbi from the ASK THE RABBI link responded. Not only was he a Rabbi; he was also a licensed therapist. We spoke for a couple of months and he was wonderful in his approach. However, at that time—I was not ready to get honest with myself & I simply stopped corresponding with him. I spent another year and a half in therapy working with a therapist locally. The anxiety did not get better. Ultimately it got worse, and the nightmares began to take over at a rapid pace of 4-5 different ones each evening. By March of 2014 one of my colleagues made the statement to me that I had no sense of community, and that perhaps—I should ask the Rabbis at Chabad if they could find the Rabbi who I had corresponded with prior—and ask if he would be willing to come back and work with me again.

I had reached the point where I was frightened that my nightmares would either give me a heart attack in my sleep; or that I might start sleep walking and cause myself bodily harm. Was G-d causing me to witness these events over and over again? Or, was it something demonic? I felt powerless to something that I did not know how to control.

My Rabbi recommended that I start reading the Tanya. It was first published in 1797, and is an early work which was written by Rabbi Shneur Zalman of Liadi [founder of Chabad Hasidism]. While it is an inspirational book on advice in the practical service of G-d; it was the first work that I had ever encountered which talks about the different parts of the soul. For me, I have felt that my relationship with G-d has become closer, and that my spirituality has evolved because of the Tanya. The book also addresses the different levels of divine service such as the tzaddik (righteous person), incomplete tzaddik, the beinoni (intermediate one), incomplete rasha, and total rasha. The book has helped me have a better understanding of the divine soul and the animal soul; how good and evil can be viewed as a struggle between the two.

My Rabbi’s approach to therapy was working. I was astounded that my anxiety level was not at the same level that it had been—prior to my engaging in therapy sessions with him. He was different than all of the other therapists that I had been with: His therapy was not just based on getting better: but how to do so by enhancing my spiritual connection with G-d.

He introduced me to the Shema Prayer this past fall. He said I should prepare my soul for sleep & read the Shema directly before going to bed.I told him that I was backwards, or in reverse because most people wanting therapy need assistance during the day. My problems flare up at night, when I am asleep.
At the time that my Rabbi introduced me to the Shema prayer—fall had just begun. Fall and the return of Spring are the periods when my nightmares tend to flare up and go on a continuous rampage. The SHEMA is the central prayer in the Jewish prayer book, and is often the first section in Scripture that a Jewish child will learn. Many Jews will recite the Shema prayer twice a day—once in the morning and in the evening.

I have often thought that when people invite a priest into their house to bless it—due to “bad or unwanted, negative energy” in the house—that this act is only temporary. If the people living in the house simply do not believe in G-d, then is this the reason why the negative energy returns again? Does the priest simply act as a “temporary bug spray” who chases the demons away?

I have been reading the Shema prayer each night, before bed since the Fall of 2014. I believe that if anyone can help me with my Holocaust Nightmares—that this assistance comes through G-d. The Rabbis at Chabad took time out of their busy schedules to listen to me. They honestly cared and wanted to help me. Without them, I would not be able to write to you today—and tell you that since I began reading the Shema prayer I have not had one Holocaust nightmare.

I also believe that in my quest to find the correct therapist to assist me—it was not just about seeking a therapist: but a better, spiritual relationship with G-d. THIS is what had been missing with all of my previous therapists: My Relationship with Hashem & having a spiritual guide(s) to assist me. I am forever grateful that the Rabbis at Chabad were able to reconnect me with my Rabbi again. Hashem is good:

The power of prayer works.

THE SHEMA PRAYER:

Cover you eyes with your right hand and say:

Hear, O Israel, the L-rd is our G-d, the L-rd is One.

Recite the following verse in an undertone:

Blessed be the name of the glory of His kingdom forever and ever.

You shall love the L-rd your G-d with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your might. And these words which I command you today shall be upon your heart. You shall teach them thoroughly to your children, and you shall speak of them when you sit in your house and when you walk on the road, when you lie down and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign upon your hand, and they shall be for a reminder between your eyes. And you shall write them upon the doorposts of your house and upon your gates.

And it will be, if you will diligently obey My commandments which I enjoin upon you this day, to love the L-rd your G-d and to serve Him with all your heart and with all your soul, I will give rain for your land at the proper time, the early rain and the late rain, and you will gather in your grain, your wine and your oil. And I will give grass in your fields for your cattle, and you will eat and be sated. Take care lest your heart be lured away, and you turn astray and worship alien gods and bow down to them. For then the L-rd’s wrath will flare up against you, and He will close the heavens so that there will be no rain and the earth will not yield its produce, and you will swiftly perish from the good land which the L-rd gives you. Therefore, place these words of Mine upon your heart and upon your soul, and bind them for a sign on your hand, and they shall be for a reminder between your eyes. You shall teach them to your children, to speak of them when you sit in your house and when you walk on the road, when you lie down and when you rise. And you shall inscribe them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates – so that your days and the days of your children may be prolonged on the land which the L-rd swore to your fathers to give to them for as long as the heavens are above the earth.

The L-rd spoke to Moses, saying: Speak to the children of Israel and tell them to make for themselves fringes on the corners of their garments throughout their generations, and to attach a thread of blue on the fringe of each corner. They shall be to you as tzizit, and you shall look upon them and remember all the commandments of the L-rd and fulfill them, and you will not follow after your heart and after your eyes by which you go astray – so that you may remember and fulfill all My commandments and be holy to your G-d. I am the L-rd your G-d who brought you out of the land of Egypt to be your G-d; I, the L-rd, am your G-d. True.

 *Translation of the SHEMA Prayer from CHABAD online.

 

Purchase “Holocaust Nightmares: ASH FROM THE ROSE” for Amazon Kindle

 

visit HOLOCAUST NIGHTMARES Exhibition & Memoir official website

 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Pam L. Fiedler is an Adjunct Professor of Design + Universal Communication at Southeast Community College in Nebraska. She teaches at both the Lincoln & Beatrice campus. She graduated in 2006 with her Master of Fine Arts in Graphic Design from the University of Iowa. “Holocaust Nightmares: Ash From the Rose” is her first novel, and is available for purchase through Amazon Kindle.

All proceeds or profits raised from posters, prints, photographs & original artwork from her HOLOCAUST EXHIBITIONS are donated to the Institute for Holocaust Education (Omaha, Nebraska). visit their website